In case y'all don't know, this will be my third year blogging. 

Wild Pennings is the third blog I've had in three years. Seriously, guys, I need to get my priorities straight. But one thing I've definitely learned about myself is that contrary to being confident around people in real life, I am the shyest Internet ghost ever. If you don't believe me, check out my follower count. They say that the best way to get followers is to comment on other blogs? That just shows you how much I've commented in three years! *facepalm*

But I think most bloggers don't have this issue? Maybe? Maybe it's just me? Oh please no, not just me. I haven't seen a post like this before, so I decided that today I will show you what blogging looks like from a shy blogger's point of view.




Commenting is probably the hardest thing for me to do.  I want to comment, but when I have this opportunity to think about what I'm going to say before I say it, I tend to over-think.

• What should I say? 
• Should I just say something generic? 
• No, it needs to be me speaking. 
• What if he/she takes this the wrong way? 
• I don't want to accidentally offend them! 
• Does this seem weird to say? 
• What if this person thinks I'm weird because this is the first time I've commented on their blog and I'm already screaming in caps? 
• Will this look wrong when it's published? 
• OH HOLY SARDINES WHAT IF I ACCIDENTALLY PUBLISH A TYPO?!
• I will be SO MORTIFIED! 
• If it's taking me this long to consider commenting, just think how long it will take me to actually comment. *groans*

I read other people's comments and I can't help thinking that if I say anything out on a tangent, I'm weird. I could end up saying the same thing as everyone else, but why do that when it's already been said? If I don't know what to say, is it even worth the time? When so many things could go wrong, it's honestly easier to just not comment.


If you don't know what to say after reading a post, take notes on a piece of scratch paper. DON'T LOOK AT OTHER COMMENTS before you comment. List all the thoughts you had while reading the post. If they think you're weird, that's not your problem. You're trying to be sincere and yourself and that's all that matters as you continue to grow your confidence. I've found that this strategy works really well for me, and it's helped me leave the sincere comments I aim for.




No joke. All bloggers have probably gone through this phase. You see that massive follower count (or what seems massive at the time) and you scuttle out of there as soon as you're done reading. These people are popular. They have Internet friends. And frankly you're kind of scared, because it feels as if you're intruding on this exclusive society of bloggers with 1000+ followers, and you're just the shy Internet ghost (or baby blogger) no one has noticed yet. Just don't even bother commenting!


First of all, you need to realize that this train of thought is WRONG. 1000 followers is a lot, but if you think about it, it's still very, very small. There are over 7.5 billion people living on earth today. 1000 is approximately 0.00000014% of the human population. The only time that number looks big is in your head when anxiety inflates it to that level. Yes, these people are popular, but there are thousands of people out there who are also popular. You could be popular in someone's eyes! And in the friendly blogosphere, these popular bloggers will probably welcome you into the conversation instead of shunning you.

It can be hard to talk to people in real life, but blogging gives us the rare opportunity of connecting with people who see life from a different point of view. In a universe so vast, we tend to make it seem minuscule with us at its center. We need to remind ourselves that everyone else sees life the same way. When our mini universes overlap, we create this magical sky filled with constellations that hold the world together.

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I used to worry about fitting in with a certain blogging group. I wanted to post about lifestyle, photography, and dolls when I was younger, but I wanted my blog to be almost exactly like a specific selection of bloggers I greatly admired. I wanted to have a similar layout, similar discussion topics, and a similar writing style. But I wasn't passionate about any of these things—not to the point where I could post consistently about them and still come up with new ideas. But I still wanted to be a part of this group. If you don't want to fit in, you probably worry about what people will think when you don't try to fit in. Will you get backlash for breaking the mainstream?


On your blog, you say what you want to say. My favorite aspect of blogging is the freedom I have to say what I feel on any subject without being edited by a magazine or a newsroom to meet their political and philosophical views. Once I post something, it's out in the world. Someone is going to read it, even if it's now or years later. You have a voice, and you are entitled to use it. Blogging is one of the best ways to exercise that power.

Don't worry about fitting in. You'll attract the readers who enjoy the things you write. You shouldn't write a specific topic that you don't enjoy just so you can feel part of a "group" or a genre. Don't be afraid of breaking the mainstream. Pick what you will uphold, write about it, and be confident.




I find it easiest to be myself on my blog. I have this preconception that people are just going to find my blog, read my posts, see my winning personality, and spread the word. They'll comment and we'll have long chats together over virtual tea and crumpets. People will come to me. That's not how making friends work. People reach out, but in an online world where you have to climb technological barriers, you have to put in the effort. That means leaving your comfort zone...and that is so, so hard.


Push yourself. Make a goal to find X number of new blogs each week, and start reading them. Make a goal to comment on X blogs that you really enjoy per day or comment on X number of blogs you've never commented on before, but have been reading for a while. Make an effort to broaden your reading list. For starters, comment on this post about how you've overcome blogger shyness! If you want to break out of the shy blogger mold, then you have to take initiative and make a commitment to yourself that it will happen.

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Making online friends felt foreign to me at first. The two reasons I had were, one, you're not talking face to face; and two, this person may or may not be writing under their real name (e.g. me). I'm very Internet-wary; I tend to play things on the safe side, following a blog for a while before I comment. I want to be able to trust them (because there are hundreds of people who use the Internet for bad things).

The other issue I have that keeps me from making Internet friends is I don't know how to start. In real life where you're shoved together, you just say "Hi, what's your name, what do you like to do?" If you share the same reservations as me, then we probably have the same problem: we tend to just hang on the sidelines even though we might really, really want to make friends with other bloggers.


You have to remember that bloggers are people, most people aren't bad, and generally, the blogging community is pretty safe, especially in the Christian lifestyle genre. Pick your online friends the way you would in real life. If you find a blogger you trust (under pen name or not), don't be afraid to reach out and say hi. Don't be afraid to drop a comment on their blog, even a short one, to let them know you enjoy their posts and are looking forward to more. Chances are, the blogger is going to read your comment, feel happy, and probably check out your blog to see what a nice person you are. And there you have the beginnings of a friendship! You might have to push yourself, but it will be worth it. Some really nice bloggers I've met and made friends with are Clara, Ivie, Abby, and Sarah.